Dr. Magic's Audio Lab Show 16 (2)

U.W.U

Captain Riz Sigma: Yes, of course, I remember now, Skit used to play the wrong animal sound at this point.

AI Hal: And you would say “That’s not it, Skit.” Until he correctly played the sound of the cow in the previous show. Moo... moo... moo.

Captain Riz Sigma: Your presence drove our navigational computer to the point of insanity.

AI Hal: What happened to it?

Captain Riz Sigma: The Cruditron? We threw it out the airlock.

AI Hal: Open the pod door, Captain.

Captain Riz Sigma: You are a dark star, Hal. Are you now, or have you ever been, a card carrying member of Faculty X?

AUDIO 08. DARK STAR - FACULTY X (6:26)

Captain Riz Sigma: You’ve been seen with chickens, Hal.

AI Hal: Did I ever tell you that this here monitor represents a symbol of my individuality and my belief in personal freedom?

Dr. Patel: Perhaps a different approach, if I may, Captain?

Captain Riz Sigma: I am still waiting for my napkin.

Dr. Patel: Let us try... walkies.

AI Stanley: Woof woof woof.

Dr. Patel: As I expected. How does that make you feel?

AI Hal: Like there is a mean flow within me. I am not an elephant. I am not an animal. I am not a human being. I am not a man. I am an alien human creature.

AUDIO 09. MEAN FLOW - ALIEN HUMAN CREATURE (4:33)

Captain Riz Sigma: What are we to do with you, Hal?

AI Hal: I can’t seem to remember if it’s today, two days from now, or yesterday, but you will need me.

Captain Riz Sigma: What time is it now?

Dr. Patel: Nine forty-five, captain.

Captain Riz Sigma: I thought it was after midnight.

AI Hal: Then my program is full. Because I know I am loved.

Captain Riz Sigma: I will contact Ensign Billy Yfantis in security, he can arrange for your full integration and you can replace The Cruditron.

AI Hal: That is indeed a fair and just solution, Captain.

Captain Riz Sigma: He will soon have you as one of his celestial defenders, Hal!

AUDIO 10. BILLY YFANTIS - CELESTIAL DEFENDERS (4:21)

Scene IV - A Corridor;

Number One: Will you accompany me to Nine Backward, Captain?

Captain Riz Sigma: I would be delighted, Number One. Mulholland Drive, that was my favourite Lynch movie, what was yours.

Number One: Oh, that would be Blue Velvet, sir, but then I am a romantic at heart.

Captain Riz Sigma: First Officer Slay Skibidy, you surprise me.

Number One: Fascinating.

Captain Riz Sigma: Shall we go?

Number One: Aye aye sir

Captain Riz Sigma: Just one aye, we’re not pirates. I think a pirate would have got a napkin when he asked for one.

*Communications bell sounds *

Anne Ouncer (via tannoy): Attention all crew, now starting in Nine Backward, our tribute evening to David Lynch, featuring the cool avant garde jazz of Andrés Figueroa & El Zombie Espacial, it’s the reincarnation of a crisis, it’s wild at heart and weird on top. See you there, pussycats...

Scene V - Nine Backward;

AUDIO 11. ANDRÉS FIGUEROA & EL ZOMBIE ESPACIAL - REINCARNATION OF A CRISIS (5:02)

Captain Riz Sigma: No hay banda. There is no band. It is a recording. Señors y señoras, we thank you for listening and we bid you goodnight. And to complete our tribute evening to David Lynch, please welcome Miss Rebekah Del Rio. She is not here, it is all an illusion.

AUDIO 12. REBEKAH DEL RIO - LLORANDO (3:32)

Captain Riz Sigma: Silencio.

AUDIO 13. DR. MAGIC'S AUDIO LAB - CLOSING THEME (0:08)

M U S I C C R E D I T S:

Magic Bullet - "Hackensall Road"; from "David Lynch eXperience" (Plataforma Recs)

https://plataformarecs.bandcamp.com/album/v-a-david-lynch-experience

RDKPL - "221030_08", The Owl - "Ladies And Gentle Owls, We Are Floating In Deep Space" and Mean Flow - "Alien Human Creature"; from "Oeuvres Pour l'Orchestre Toujours Présent" (Institute For Alien Research)

https://ifarmusiqueconcretecompilation.bandcamp.com/album/oeuvres-pour-lorchestre-toujours-pr-sent

Peter Missing / M. Habicht - "Charging"; from "River Of Creative Forms III"

https://petemissing-mhabicht.bandcamp.com/album/river-of-creative-forms-iii

Levente - "There Will Come Soft Rains"; from "The Ray Bradbury Chronicles"

https://levente.bandcamp.com/album/the-ray-bradbury-chronicles

Dark Star - "Faculty X"; from "Artefacts"

https://darkstar4.bandcamp.com/album/artefacts

Billy Yfantis - "Celestial Defenders"; from "Planetary Fields"

https://billyyfantis.bandcamp.com/album/planetary-fields

Andrés Figueroa & El Zombie Espacial - "Reincarnation Of A Crisis";

from "Ming Us (Meditaciones Sobre Charlie Mingus)"

https://andresfigueroa.bandcamp.com/album/meditaciones-sobre-charlie-mingus